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他給你五千元錢了嗎？

6月 7, 2013

林若綠

kuso

Obama to start normalizing U.S. relations with Cuba - CBS News有兩對夫妻在一起打麻將。小張一不小心掉地上一張牌，他就鑽到桌子底下去撿，可他抬頭一看，發現小王的太太沒有穿褲衩。他嚇了一跳，腦袋撞在桌子上，鑽出來時滿臉通紅。小王的太太看出來他看到了自己的下身，就裝做沒事一樣。事後，小張接到小王太太的電話，她問：「你昨天鑽到桌子底下是不是看到了我沒穿褲衩？」小張不好In a historic move, the administration is beginning talks with the communist nation to restore full diplomacy ... Mr. Obama acknowledged that the U.S. and Cuba have a "complicated history," with ideological and economic barriers that developed against the...

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機不可失！？

6月 7, 2013

連冷文

kuso

Johnny Manziel of Cleveland Browns to start at quarterback against Cincinnati Bengals - ESPN爸爸看見小明做錯了事，不禁火冒三丈的想揍他一頓。  媽媽求情說：「這次就饒了他吧！下次再懲罰他也不遲啊！」 爸爸反問：「你說的倒簡單，若是下次他不再犯了呢？」 有一天，書店裡來了一位顧客問店員：「我想買本書，可是我希望裡面沒有仇殺、 沒有愛情、沒有懸疑、沒有千萬富翁，也沒有美女、Cleveland Browns rookie quarterback Johnny Manziel will make his first career start this weekend against the Cincinnati Bengals. Browns coach Mike Pettine announced the decision Tuesday afternoon. The team informed Manziel and Brian Hoyer, who has started...

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愛情 vs 同情

6月 7, 2013

張易旋

kuso

M.B.A. Programs Start to Follow Silicon Valley Into the Data Age - NYTimes.com老夫：「妳真是我所看過最美麗、體貼的女人。」老妻：「三十年前你也是這麼說的，可見你還是愛我的嘍！」老夫：「以前是愛情，現在是同情....」7. 女人的力量男：「如果我緊緊地靠著妳，妳會怎麼樣？」女：「我當然會反抗。」男：「如果我拉妳的手，妳會怎麼辦？」女：「我會反抗。」男：「如果我摟住妳的腰，妳會怎Leading business schools are breaking from traditional approaches and picking up the digital-age arts of speed and constant experimentation. ... Cornell Tech, a partnership with Technion-Israel Institute of Technology, began with a relative handful of com...

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妳們都來了為什麼沒有人給我衛生紙

6月 7, 2013

黃如筠

kuso

Carolines Mode | Carolines Mode Start高中讀的是女校，大家感情融洽無所不談尤其是大便和月經之事更是我們熱愛的話題（男女合校很難暢談這種事）所以對於這些事也不會避諱或害羞甚麼的高三某天留晚自習時，強者我同學很開心的跟我說「欸我現在好想大便喔，羨慕我吧嘻嘻」由於高三許多人都因壓力大而有便秘的困擾，我也著實羨慕了她一陣過了很久她傳簡訊求救：「My favorite lip balms as of right now. Top 5 (in no particular order). 1. Rouge Dior Baume in 538 Boreale - this one adds a hint of the perfect coral shade 2. Caudalie Lip Conditioner - a regular conditioner for everyday 3. Chanel Rogue Coco Baume - a cle...

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三叔坐船走了

6月 7, 2013

范姜映梅

kuso

Plague Tips: Plague Tip #2 – Best Places to Start Your Plague台灣傳統農業社會中,媳婦通常稱自己丈夫的哥哥為大伯,弟弟為小叔.一日,老張在忙完田裡的工作後來到溪邊洗澡,忽然想起和已過逝的老伴多年的甜蜜春光,一時性起,見四下無人就當場DIY了起來,事畢,隨手摘片樹葉擦了後就放到溪中隨波逐流,口中喃喃唸著:"唉!如果妳媽媽還在世,你就是老三了”,突然一I've went thru and played all 7 plagues casual, normal, and brutal. tried many places to start each plague, EGYPT, everytime I start in EGYPT I always have better luck, a small narrow channel with two seaports and an airport, plus they're poor with terrib...

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岳母和獅子

6月 7, 2013

連元柳

kuso

Chicago Bears to start Jimmy Clausen over Jay Cutler this week - ESPN Chicago獵人帶著太太、岳母一起到叢林狩獵，他們獵了一天，當晚就在叢林深處 露營。 第二天一早，卻發現岳母不見了！獵人與太太倆慌忙出去找人。 結果在離營地不遠的空地上，他們看到──岳母大人和一隻兇猛的獅子面 對面僵持著！ 「怎麼辦？」太太驚慌的問。 The Chicago Bears plan to start Jimmy Clausen at quarterback this week over Jay Cutler, sources told ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter. Cutler has struggled this season in leading the Bears to a 5-9 record. In Monday's 31-15 loss to the New Orleans Saints, h...

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